Back in the day directions were like “Go past that big red barn with the fence that’s kinda coming down and then about a mile or so down the road turn on the dirt road by that big Sycamore tree - if you come to the people’s house with the green fence, you’ve gone too far” 😆😆 how lovely you had a day without devices - the constant “breaking news” and barrage of influencer posts can definitely be anxiety provoking. I’m not advocating we go back to not having these things but you’ve shown that we don’t have to be tethered to our devices at all times. Thank you for this good essay!
I still prefer directions like this! It’s so much more interesting, isn’t it? Thank you for the thoughtful comment! I didn’t even know if this would be of interest to anyone but me! It was a good experiment. I want more of it.
I also prefer directions using ‘landmarks’ buildings, etc. the only problem is trying to tell someone else how to get there because I don’t know the streets. lol.
Totally agree Wendy. I’d have replied sooner but I was without any bars (the signal kind) crossing Oklahoma and Texas! And so, never checked in with the outside world. On the other hand we found some great barbecue.
I love this question Wendy: “What would we have instead if we didn’t have constant information? If we weren’t constantly accessible?” I’m deliberate about having phone and computer hours for a certain time of each day and then it’s plugged into the wall out-of-site, on silent, outside those hours. Thankfully, my husband doesn’t mind being tethered so everyone knows to contact him for emergencies.:) But during those hours without, I always feel a resetting to my own pace and interior life, as necessary as drinking water. The image I have is of a bioluminescent jelly fish, tentacles outstretched everywhere when we’re using our devices. And when they’re out away, those glowing arms retract and all the light is held within. No less luminous, just contained and generative.
This is an exquisitely poetic and beautiful image. The jellyfish. Yes. This is what I want. Contained and generative light. Thank you for adding to my journey with this. x
Those of us in "this age range" have memories, however fuzzy, of life before phones and personal computers. I held out on getting a smartphone for the longest time, because I knew it would be addicting for me. I see myself clearly in way you describe your interactions with tech. I don't watch t.v. which I'm glad of, but I make up for it with other screen time. And my roles in communications, both professional and volunteer, make it virtually impossible for me to ever really unplug. But I love it when I manage to spend several hours immersed in a project, or at an event where the more mindless activities on either device are displaced by something more focused. One of my kids, a millennial who likes to mention that hers was the last generation before high-speed internet became ubiquitous, is now "Bricking" her phone (https://getbrick.com/).
Good for you for taking this on, Wendy. I hope the calm of those 36 hours rejuvenated some part of you.
Thank you. It did. And I want more of it. Like you, when I’m fully absorbed in something for hours (usually art, writing, or time with a loved one) I feel more satisfied than the jumping around I experience with tech. I go deeper. I’ve read that it would be a good thing to allow ourselves to become bored, and I think that’s true for me. I have a similar challenge yet to be done on my bingo card. A day of stillness. No tv. No book. Maybe a walk. (I haven’t decided.) Just quiet time with my thoughts. And no doubt some boredom. It will be hard! And good for me, I think.
The brick device is fascinating. An acknowledgment of how addictive it all is that we need overt controls so that it doesn’t control us…
I feel this so strongly. I read an article many years ago (but not so many that smartphones didn't exist) where the writer compared the phone in his pocket to the One Ring in the Lord of the Rings. Frodo doesn't want to put it on, knows how destructive it is, and yet his hand relentlessly creeps toward it, and that's how having a smartphone in your pocket feels, and I was like YES. (Not "yes that's great" but "yes I do that too." The theft of attention and focus is real, and habit is so strong, and yet the phone/laptop also summon help in an emergency and preserve memories and connect us to each other (without them, you and I would have never met).
Thank you for sharing your day of disconnecting with us. I'm not sure I have it in me (yet) to unplug for an entire day but you've certainly given me a lot to think about.
Yes, all of that! The comparison to the One Ring is so apt. It is a strong pull, and difficult to manage. But yes, there so many advantages to this tech. Since that day, I’ve been trying to do mini disconnections (like I won’t check substack again until tomorrow). I failed. Because it’s hard. Because I can change my mind (which is mostly a good thing). But I need a better balance overall.
There have been a number of times in the last two years where I have forgotten my phone as we've left the house for a day of errands and run and runarounds. And I have found those moments liberating. Also...the clock on my Vespa has read 12:00 ever since the batter died last year. I have no idea what time it is when I'm scooting around or when I'm on my bicycle. This makes going to work completely unstressful. I don't worry or even think about being late (I am never late). We need breaks from all that noise. I'm glad you had one.
I love how you have such an easy time with it! I’m very tied to both devices (typing on one now…). But I did very much like not having it for awhile, because the space filled in with something else. A quieter something. I want more of that! I’m picturing you tooling around in your vespa no phone, no clock… GOALS.
It is scary how dependent I am now on my phone. It is usually nearby, although I tend to keep it in a pocket rather than carrying it in my had when I'm out. I've learned the hard way that it's good to have one in reach when I am out (I broke my ankle before I had even a flip phone, and that was the event that made me get one.
it's been very useful for when meeting friends at an airport when we're all coming from distant cities. I would like to doom scroll less. I've banned all social media apps from my phone and only check in on my evening or afternoon computer time. Yesterday I got involved in a project (making more sketchbooks! so many sketchbooks!) and didn't turn on my computer all day. Yay!
Congrats on going 36 hours offline. When I travel I only take my phone and completely check out of social media. Heaven!
but the whole internet connectivity thing is a mixed bag, both blessing and curse. Something to think about soon.
I’m dependent, too. And I don’t want to be. On the rare occasion I forget my phone when I leave the house, I feel mild panic. It’s too much. A security blanket. I don’t have substack on it, which is good—I’m on ss on my laptop only, which is a helpful limit. It’s absolutely a blessing and a curse and a handful to manage. I’m really sorry you broke your ankle! Yes—in that situation, a phone is a lifeline.
Yes, I get the same panic feeling when I leave the house (rare, but it happens) without my phone.
When I broke my ankle (2006-pre any cell phone) I was lucky that one of ,my neighbors saw me sitting in the snow at the side of the rode and had my friend come get me.
I love that we’re doing this together. It’s peaceful, right? I like being much more aware of everything around me, even though there are worlds in these little machines. (And it’s where a lot of my friends—like you!—live. ❤️)
My first phone was also bought by my husband "for emergencies" and I too, have the smallest iphone. It does not go everywhere with me when I am at work or home, so I often miss messages, and I am okay with that.
When I am waiting somewhere I really try not to get out my phone, but instead watch people around me. Most of them are looking at their phones of course! But those who aren't often start talking to me which can be sort of weird and interesting. And good.
Parallel lives! And I OFTEN miss when people talked to each other casually out in the world. Whenever I’m in line, people are always on their phones. I find it a little sad. Not in judgment, but for me—that those little connections were lovely and they happen so rarely now.
It’s the wild chicken with the arrow in its leg that you saved!
I can’t imagine seeing that. Grateful you both jumped into action and created this happy ending. I can see you trying to catch the chicken:). Then you gently returned the chicken home… Thank you!
Back in the day directions were like “Go past that big red barn with the fence that’s kinda coming down and then about a mile or so down the road turn on the dirt road by that big Sycamore tree - if you come to the people’s house with the green fence, you’ve gone too far” 😆😆 how lovely you had a day without devices - the constant “breaking news” and barrage of influencer posts can definitely be anxiety provoking. I’m not advocating we go back to not having these things but you’ve shown that we don’t have to be tethered to our devices at all times. Thank you for this good essay!
I still prefer directions like this! It’s so much more interesting, isn’t it? Thank you for the thoughtful comment! I didn’t even know if this would be of interest to anyone but me! It was a good experiment. I want more of it.
I also prefer directions using ‘landmarks’ buildings, etc. the only problem is trying to tell someone else how to get there because I don’t know the streets. lol.
SAME. I don’t know the streets either!
Totally agree Wendy. I’d have replied sooner but I was without any bars (the signal kind) crossing Oklahoma and Texas! And so, never checked in with the outside world. On the other hand we found some great barbecue.
You were free! Now that I’ve done it for a day, I look forward to expanding on that… (and great barbecue cannot be underestimated)
I love this question Wendy: “What would we have instead if we didn’t have constant information? If we weren’t constantly accessible?” I’m deliberate about having phone and computer hours for a certain time of each day and then it’s plugged into the wall out-of-site, on silent, outside those hours. Thankfully, my husband doesn’t mind being tethered so everyone knows to contact him for emergencies.:) But during those hours without, I always feel a resetting to my own pace and interior life, as necessary as drinking water. The image I have is of a bioluminescent jelly fish, tentacles outstretched everywhere when we’re using our devices. And when they’re out away, those glowing arms retract and all the light is held within. No less luminous, just contained and generative.
This is an exquisitely poetic and beautiful image. The jellyfish. Yes. This is what I want. Contained and generative light. Thank you for adding to my journey with this. x
Those of us in "this age range" have memories, however fuzzy, of life before phones and personal computers. I held out on getting a smartphone for the longest time, because I knew it would be addicting for me. I see myself clearly in way you describe your interactions with tech. I don't watch t.v. which I'm glad of, but I make up for it with other screen time. And my roles in communications, both professional and volunteer, make it virtually impossible for me to ever really unplug. But I love it when I manage to spend several hours immersed in a project, or at an event where the more mindless activities on either device are displaced by something more focused. One of my kids, a millennial who likes to mention that hers was the last generation before high-speed internet became ubiquitous, is now "Bricking" her phone (https://getbrick.com/).
Good for you for taking this on, Wendy. I hope the calm of those 36 hours rejuvenated some part of you.
Thank you. It did. And I want more of it. Like you, when I’m fully absorbed in something for hours (usually art, writing, or time with a loved one) I feel more satisfied than the jumping around I experience with tech. I go deeper. I’ve read that it would be a good thing to allow ourselves to become bored, and I think that’s true for me. I have a similar challenge yet to be done on my bingo card. A day of stillness. No tv. No book. Maybe a walk. (I haven’t decided.) Just quiet time with my thoughts. And no doubt some boredom. It will be hard! And good for me, I think.
The brick device is fascinating. An acknowledgment of how addictive it all is that we need overt controls so that it doesn’t control us…
I feel this so strongly. I read an article many years ago (but not so many that smartphones didn't exist) where the writer compared the phone in his pocket to the One Ring in the Lord of the Rings. Frodo doesn't want to put it on, knows how destructive it is, and yet his hand relentlessly creeps toward it, and that's how having a smartphone in your pocket feels, and I was like YES. (Not "yes that's great" but "yes I do that too." The theft of attention and focus is real, and habit is so strong, and yet the phone/laptop also summon help in an emergency and preserve memories and connect us to each other (without them, you and I would have never met).
Thank you for sharing your day of disconnecting with us. I'm not sure I have it in me (yet) to unplug for an entire day but you've certainly given me a lot to think about.
Yes, all of that! The comparison to the One Ring is so apt. It is a strong pull, and difficult to manage. But yes, there so many advantages to this tech. Since that day, I’ve been trying to do mini disconnections (like I won’t check substack again until tomorrow). I failed. Because it’s hard. Because I can change my mind (which is mostly a good thing). But I need a better balance overall.
There have been a number of times in the last two years where I have forgotten my phone as we've left the house for a day of errands and run and runarounds. And I have found those moments liberating. Also...the clock on my Vespa has read 12:00 ever since the batter died last year. I have no idea what time it is when I'm scooting around or when I'm on my bicycle. This makes going to work completely unstressful. I don't worry or even think about being late (I am never late). We need breaks from all that noise. I'm glad you had one.
I love how you have such an easy time with it! I’m very tied to both devices (typing on one now…). But I did very much like not having it for awhile, because the space filled in with something else. A quieter something. I want more of that! I’m picturing you tooling around in your vespa no phone, no clock… GOALS.
I realized that the only thing I missed was not having a camera on me. You'll get there.
Yes—the camera part is crucial. I take a lot of photos!
It is scary how dependent I am now on my phone. It is usually nearby, although I tend to keep it in a pocket rather than carrying it in my had when I'm out. I've learned the hard way that it's good to have one in reach when I am out (I broke my ankle before I had even a flip phone, and that was the event that made me get one.
it's been very useful for when meeting friends at an airport when we're all coming from distant cities. I would like to doom scroll less. I've banned all social media apps from my phone and only check in on my evening or afternoon computer time. Yesterday I got involved in a project (making more sketchbooks! so many sketchbooks!) and didn't turn on my computer all day. Yay!
Congrats on going 36 hours offline. When I travel I only take my phone and completely check out of social media. Heaven!
but the whole internet connectivity thing is a mixed bag, both blessing and curse. Something to think about soon.
I’m dependent, too. And I don’t want to be. On the rare occasion I forget my phone when I leave the house, I feel mild panic. It’s too much. A security blanket. I don’t have substack on it, which is good—I’m on ss on my laptop only, which is a helpful limit. It’s absolutely a blessing and a curse and a handful to manage. I’m really sorry you broke your ankle! Yes—in that situation, a phone is a lifeline.
Yes, I get the same panic feeling when I leave the house (rare, but it happens) without my phone.
When I broke my ankle (2006-pre any cell phone) I was lucky that one of ,my neighbors saw me sitting in the snow at the side of the rode and had my friend come get me.
Now I don't go out even to garden without it.
That is understandable. And a good safety precaution. Thank goodness for that neighbor!
I am so stoked that you held that space for yourself. I, too, am finding respite in the not checking mode. Thank you for sharing honestly friend 💜
I love that we’re doing this together. It’s peaceful, right? I like being much more aware of everything around me, even though there are worlds in these little machines. (And it’s where a lot of my friends—like you!—live. ❤️)
My first phone was also bought by my husband "for emergencies" and I too, have the smallest iphone. It does not go everywhere with me when I am at work or home, so I often miss messages, and I am okay with that.
When I am waiting somewhere I really try not to get out my phone, but instead watch people around me. Most of them are looking at their phones of course! But those who aren't often start talking to me which can be sort of weird and interesting. And good.
Parallel lives! And I OFTEN miss when people talked to each other casually out in the world. Whenever I’m in line, people are always on their phones. I find it a little sad. Not in judgment, but for me—that those little connections were lovely and they happen so rarely now.
I love that you tried to track pad your book :)
That made me laugh, too. : )
You made it! You disconnected:)
It’s the wild chicken with the arrow in its leg that you saved!
I can’t imagine seeing that. Grateful you both jumped into action and created this happy ending. I can see you trying to catch the chicken:). Then you gently returned the chicken home… Thank you!
I did! And thank YOU. The chicken made me furious (like: who the hell did this to her?!) and then so glad when we were able to help.